It’s easy to take for granted that we have a time machine in our brain. We humans, as a species, are uniquely capable of looking forward into the future and predicting potential outcomes, as well as reflecting on the past and extrapolating it. The world is chaotic, of course, and our powers of prediction are often limited; in many chaotic systems outcomes can change radically based on very minor changes in their inputs – a phenomenon commonly understood as the ‘butterfly effect.’ Nonetheless, we can make a great many predictions with some reliability – we can be fairly certain the sun will rise in the morning, that we’ll need to find something to eat and drink to sustain us, and that we’ll still need to pay our taxes at the end of the year. We can predict that if we drink a 12 pack of beer every day we will become fat, unhealthy, and unhappy. This predictive capacity and ability to plan is fairly unique to humans, thanks in no small part to our substantial prefrontal cortex, and it is something we should treasure. I often think about Tolkien’s elves – endowed with a mystical wisdom and blessed with a gift of foresight. When the craft and abilities of Elves were viewed by the hobbits, they described it as magic; but the elves often did not understand their wonder, or what they meant by magic. The power of these peoples in Tolkien’s fiction was just as much founded in their wisdom, knowledge, skill and experience. Sure we’re not elves, but our ability to predict the future would seem near as magical to a beast who lacks it.
German philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche described man as “An animal with the right to make promises.” A promise is our ability to conceive of a future and say we will make it so. It is part and parcel of our ability to remember – forgetfulness is abrogated when a promise is made – which Nietzsche names a “real memory of the Will.” We can see a future we desire, and bend the world around us to create that future. Say it will be so, and let it be so, because you will it.
Perhaps we have the right to make a promise, but what about the capacity to keep a promise? What many of us often don’t know, or don’t want to know, is how likely we are to be able to quit drinking, get out for that morning jog, or be good to our friends even when we’re tired and grumpy. Perhaps we reflect on the terrors of the Holocaust, and while we say it is intolerable, we privately wonder if we would have the courage to stand up to such a travesty. Would we allow it? Perhaps even support it? Is it unthinkable? Perhaps you’ve lied and cheated many times before, and despite your desire to change, you know it is harder than it seems. The rational part of our brain that can tell us that our bad habits are ruining us are only one part of us – or as Nietzsche put it, “Our organism is an oligarchy.” There are other parts of us, just as much *us*, that encourages us to behave compulsively. Our own bodies, minds and moods are chaotic and variable, and even if we veil our lack of self efficacy in purposeful ignorance, this insecurity is something that can gnaw at anyone who has failed, failed, and failed again to keep a promise. The will is a fickle thing, and even if we have a memory of the will, it can fail us.
Educator Stephen Covey described the power of making and keeping promises perfectly in his book “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People,”
“The commitments we make to ourselves and to others, and our integrity to those commitments, is the essence and clearest manifestation of our proactivity. It is also the essence of our growth. Through our human endowments of self-awareness and conscience, we become conscious of areas of weakness, areas for improvement, areas of talent that could be developed, areas that need to be changed or eliminated from our lives. Then, as we recognize and use our imagination and independent will to act on that awareness—making promises, setting goals, and being true to them—we build the strength of character, the being, that makes possible every other positive thing in our lives. It is here that we find two ways to put ourselves in control of our lives immediately. We can make a promise—and keep it. Or we can set a goal—and work to achieve it. As we make and keep commitments, even small commitments, we begin to establish an inner integrity that gives us the awareness of self-control and the courage and strength to accept more of the responsibility for our own lives. By making and keeping promises to ourselves and others, little by little, our honor becomes greater than our moods.”
Breaking a promise is more than a betrayal to others, it’s a betrayal to yourself and to your incredible gift of foresight. Every time you break a promise, you undermine your faith in your will to manifest a future of your choosing. Every time you sleep in instead of going for that run, you create a plausible future where you do it every time. There is only so much self-delusion about our ability to keep our own promises that we can manage – if a liar vouches for your future, why would you trust him? Without the faith in your promise, how can you count on the outcome? Do not think that your incredible predictive engine doesn’t account for this flimsy data when making its projections. This lack of faith suffocates hope – what a despairing, powerless feeling it is, to know that your promise is worthless, that no matter what you say, your future self will bounce the cheque. Lack of trust in yourself is the surest way to destroy your agency, to completely undermine your capacity to act willfully – you are left a victim to the whims of your environment and your ever-changing mood.
Aristotle tackled the concept of self-control with a powerful metaphor describing our individual acts versus their patterns of behavior. He described an individual act of volition being “like a rout in battle stopped by first one man making a stand and then another, until the original formation has been restored.” In matters of willpower it is often easiest for us to have one last smoke, and *then* begin, but that one last smoke represents a pattern. Each instance of us abstaining, or failing, is like a soldier standing or retreating, either in formation or in rout. When our will stands in a steady phalanx, it can withstand the onslaught of temptation, but each time our individual acts peels away a sturdy shield and a glimmering spear tip, the formation weakens.
It is not easy to keep promises. You need to know yourself – you need to understand, truly understand, what you are capable of. Breaking a small promise is not a small thing, it is a chasm, and it can be a difficult one to escape. As you continue to keep your word, your foresight, your ability not only to see but *create* the future, will be bolstered time and time again. You will become formidable, and trustworthy, and truthful. Do not make promises you know you can’t keep, and keep the promises you make as if your future depended on it – it does.
Works Referenced
Covey, Stephen R. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change. Anniversary edition. New York: Free Press, 2004. – Amazon Link
Nietzsche, Friedrich, Walter Arnold Kaufmann, R. J Hollingdale, and Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche. On the Genealogy of Morals. New York: Vintage Books, 1989. – Amazon Link
Rachlin, Howard. The Science of Self-Control. Cambridge, Mass: Harvard University Press, 2000. – Amazon Link
Tolkien, J. R. R. The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring. International edition. London: Harper Collins Canada, 1998. – Amazon Link
